A Question to Men : Do you want to be Happy or do you want to be Right?
Jeff Allen is one of my favorite comedians for one reason: He’s AUTHENTIC. Jeff nails it for Men and Women when it comes to the mystery of “Communication” in marriage. He said his father asked him before he got married, “Son, I only have one piece of marital advice for you. Before you argue with your wife, and believe me you will argue, you need to ask yourself TWO Questions: Do you want to be right or do you want to be Happy?” To see more of his conversation with his dad click here to view this great video clip or watch this short clip below:
In the same way that Jeff speaks about this humorous communication process, we need to understand the same is true when we are “Communicating about Money” with our spouse. Women could CARE LESS about how much men “Hunt” to bring home provisions for the family. They are more concerned about you as the husband, “CONTROLLING The MONEY and TELLING IT WHAT TO DO”. Don’t let the lack of planning cause the money to control you. Bottom Line: Women care more about SECURITY !!! All they need to know men is that do we have money to take care of Emergencies, stay current with our Basic Necessities, and have a PLAN for the future so we can retire with dignity.
Remember that old saying, “If Mama Ain’t Happy, ain’t NOBODY Happy.” Do you know how the rest of that saying goes? According to my mother, the rest of that saying goes like this, “And if Daddy Ain’t Happy, Ain’t Nobody that Cares!” Sorry men, the women wrote those rules. (Smile for Mama)
So in the world of Personal Finance, men have to get these FOUR things right to make “Mama Happy”. FIRST, Build the Emergency Fund FOREVER (Never stop contributing). This means that the money will be there when it rains (And I promise it will ALWAYS Rain). Second, have a BUDGET (Have all Basic Necessities Accounted for Every Month…Tell the money where to go) and learn to pay CASH for certain items like Groceries. THIRD, DON’T BORROW MONEY!!! Stop being a slave to Credit Cards. They are plastic explosives for your future! And FOURTH, CREATE A LEGACY by SAVING for RETIREMENT so you can retire with Dignity. These nuggets of wisdom are very simple, but will NEVER happen if you don’t make it a PRIORITY. Men have got to understand that God wired women for “Security” and implementing the above four actions will create ROMANCE in your marriage. That’s right, there is “ROMANCE IN FINANCE” !!! To quote Jeff Allen: “HAPPY WIFE, HAPPY LIFE!”
Take action TODAY to get on the path God intended for you and I in living a Debt Free Lifestyle. Change your behavior and you can change the world! Don’t believe me? I DARE you to try it!
Let’s just face the facts in regard to worrying. Worrying doesn’t change ANYTHING. I use to buy into the lie that some people are just born that way. The truth is that there’s NO SUCH THING as a Born Worrier. Worry is a response that is learned. We learn from our parents, peers, or maybe from an experience (that’s me). What’s really GOOD NEWS about that statement is that you and I can “Unlearn” the response of Worrying. Jesus was very clear about worry. He said in Matthew 6:34, “So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.(NLT)” My parents use to tell me when I started to worry, “Use that energy of worrying for something better so you will feel better about yourself.” They were right. What if we PRAYED about everything? How much different would your life be if you prayed about everything. If I prayed as much as I worried, I’d have a whole lot less to worry about. God is really interested in ALL the details of our lives. He even cares about things we may consider silly like our House payment. He wants to be involved in every aspect. I want you to see the BIG PICTURE: You and I can take ANY situation or concern we face to God 24 HOURS A DAY ! That’s a BIG Deal ! So if I pray more than worry, how should my approach be toward God? Approach with Thanks. I need to Thank God in ALL Things. I was always told by my Granny, “When you pray to God, enter into His place with Thanksgiving.” She’s right. Rick Warren says, “The healthiest human emotion is not love–but Gratitude. It actually increases your immunities; it makes you more resistant to stress and less susceptible to illness.” That sounds like a really good reason to be grateful. Ever noticed how grateful people are much more happy? Ungrateful people are miserable no matter what. It’s just never good enough for them. Being grateful will reduce the Stress level. We could all use less stress.The biggest area that I guarantee will reduce your stress level in addition to being grateful is: YOUR THOUGHT PROCESS. Just like the saying, “You are what you eat” states, this can also be said about our thoughts : “You are what you Think.” I’ve heard it said this way, “You must change the way you think; the way you think determines how you feel. And the way you feel determines how you act.” What does this mean? It means that if you want to change your life, you need to change what you are thinking about. You must be INTENTIONAL about what you think about. Focus on the positive and on God’s Word. Change your thinking process and you will change your life.Paul tells us in Philippians 4:6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Who doesn’t want “the peace of God? Someone who worries.